The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
His nipple licking is glorious
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