I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
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