stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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