Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Did you fuck her?

  (212): View more from New York

  If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.

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  (703): Did you fuck her? (212): If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that. http://tfl.nu/y42g
  Replies (3) Good night (1107) Bad night (3182)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.

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  (979): Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight. http://tfl.nu/18md
  Replies (85) Good night (14021) Bad night (1334)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  She is totally STD

  (941): View more from Florida

  Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD

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  (941): She is totally STD (941): Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD http://tfl.nu/ruv5
  Replies (52) Good night (1226) Bad night (4236)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics

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  (716): My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics http://tfl.nu/wc24
  Replies (50) Good night (5456) Bad night (1223)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?

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  (260): Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on? http://tfl.nu/ottv
  Replies (5) Good night (4053) Bad night (1186)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.

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  (319): How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules. http://tfl.nu/ttz2
  Replies (26) Good night (8204) Bad night (1540)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?

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  (859): how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong? http://tfl.nu/c3b4
  Replies (6) Good night (991) Bad night (2843)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night

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  (435): Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night http://tfl.nu/xeqd
  Replies (19) Good night (1985) Bad night (1281)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.

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  (+44): That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard. http://tfl.nu/cdhm
  Replies (20) Good night (4978) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right

  (631): View more from New York

  Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15

  (585): View more from New York

  hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos

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  (585): Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right (631): Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15 (585): hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos http://tfl.nu/8bsi
  Replies (8) Good night (2285) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...

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  (801): I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you... http://tfl.nu/j9so
  Replies (11) Good night (2520) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.

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  (605): Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you. http://tfl.nu/wiel
  Replies (26) Good night (1505) Bad night (926)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.

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  (612): I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise. http://tfl.nu/awbv
  Replies (4) Good night (1495) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!

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  (716): It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT! http://tfl.nu/5pm7
  Replies (1) Good night (530) Bad night (1022)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?

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  (818): Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding? http://tfl.nu/07ft
  Replies (1) Good night (504) Bad night (290)

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