I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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