Farmville is her only friend.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize