The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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