Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize