I'm gonna have a badass scar
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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