Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
