well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
