i just sent this text using only my big toe
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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