Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
what day is it and did you see me today?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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