I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
