He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Randomize
