last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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