Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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