He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
