remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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