dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
My feet surprised me
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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