Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
