You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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