you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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