dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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