Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
