you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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