one two three fourrrrnication!
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
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Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
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I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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