just come out here and I will go home with you...
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
40s are totally the cure
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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