that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
