i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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