I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
