I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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