Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
