Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
