Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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