So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
i need some magic done to my vagina
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize