How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
