Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
