I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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