I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
