his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
