Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
