That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
