She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
