1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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