wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably