Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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