I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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