just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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