Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Randomize